


just be near

by kaptenmeriadoc



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Heartache, Heartbreak, M/M, Sad Harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-31
Updated: 2014-01-31
Packaged: 2018-01-10 17:59:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1162801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaptenmeriadoc/pseuds/kaptenmeriadoc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry needs Louis and Louis doesn't care too much about that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	just be near

It was late December. Obviously it had to be late fucking December, Harry thought. Of course it just had to be inbetween Christmas and New Year's eve, of course. The thin layer of snow outside the window was fucking mandatory. So was the crowd surrounding him, laughing, buzzing and toasting for the old and the new. He could barely hear them. Obviously it had to be late December and obviously he would have to stare out the window, making a huge prat of himself, just to avoid catching a glimpse of Louis. Fucking obviously.

 

Just knowing that Louis was in the same room as him was painful enough, but what made it unbarable was the fact that he paid absolutely no attention to Harry. It wasn't really a surprise - Louis was the most beautiful boy that had ever been and Harry was Harry. No one had ever wanted him before, and to expect Louis out of all people to be the first was plain stupidity. And yet, Harry couldn't bring himself to leave. The door was just a few metres away and nobody would miss him, all it would take was a few metres and possibly an apologetic text message to Liam. But there he stood, frozen. Staring out the window, trying to focus on nothing but the streetlights and the dark sky. He failed miserably.

 

Instead, he thought about soft, brown hair and a smile worth dying for. Blue eyes that could end wars. Neat hands, sharp elbows. Louis. How his breath had felt against Harry's torso all those months ago. Harry had been as amazed as can be when he found himself running his fingers up and down Louis' spine, not understanding why this happened to him. The answer came one week later, when Louis wrinkled his eyebrows while trying to place Harry's face at another meaningless party. Turns out he had been high as a house the previous Friday, not being able to control his action and not being able to remember them once he had gotten sober again. Louis hadn't thought much of it; all he gave Harry was a "sorry, mate" and a pat on the shoulder. Harry, however, thought much of it. He had fallen asleep with a demon holdning down his chest close to every night ever since, keeping him from breathing properly. Louis had been Harry's for less than one very drunken hour, but Harry had always been Louis'.

 

It hurt. It hurt so bad. It was the worst kind of pain. It didn't tear him apart. He wish it would. Every cell of his body ached, but kept on being attached to eachother. He would have prefered a big explosion. He felt way too compact, like he was less of a person, more of a big sad lump. He didn't blame Louis for not wanting a big, sad lump. Especially when that lump was Harry.

 

He saw Louis' reflection in the glass. To pretend that he didn't would have been silly. It was all he could focus on. Maybe it was stupid of him to always be so near. Maybe he should stop following Louis' best friends on Twitter just to know which party to go to in order to spend time feeling even more melancholic than he would alone in his flat. And maybe, just maybe, he should approach him. Show Louis that he is more than a curly head on a tall body which magically seems to appear at all the parties he goes to. But then again, is he really more than that? Does he have anything that could make him intresting to Louis? Wouldn't getting his hopes up be the most stupid thing he could ever do?

 

He stands still. It's still fucking December. 

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I created this but now I'm feeling slightly sad. If anyone cares the inspiration came from this masterpiece: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrWSDVvcKkw 
> 
> Peace and love and I hope that every single one of you will be kissing beautiful babes tonight and tomorrow and always.


End file.
